Luser Attitude Re-adjustment Tool
The alt.sysadmin.recovery FAQ recommends the following LARTs. A 2x4 works fine, but a real professional needs something a little more effective. Unfortunately, this is a very personal thing, and no consensus has yet been reached on the group. Everything from a simple, 7.65mm Walther (for the Bond fans only, it's not a very good gun) to a 155mm with depleted Uranium rounds has been suggested, some even going for exotic things like Thermite, nukes or flamethrowers. For further info, look at the rec.guns home page.